Happy Halloween!





I love the fall... the leaves falling, the pumpkins, the warm soups on a cold day.
Staying inside to watch a movie-cuddling on the couch (in your P.J.s).
Increasingly with my age my like of Halloween has grown distant.
I love the costumes and I love the fun that the kids have.
I don't like the ghouls and ghosts and all the dark things that seem to come with Halloween.
I love the cute clowns, the princess and all the sweet innocent and funny things that come.

BUT above all that I love to carve pumpkins.
With a family of 5 we have to carve 5. It is a lot of work. To me it is worth it.
We had Madi and Nori help clean them our.
YUCK! Is all Madi could say. Nori thought it was fun.

We carved them a little early because Brian had to go to Canada for work.
Brian left the week of Halloween and didn't come home until after all of the Halloween Festivities.
It is a lot of work to take a Running 5 year old out and a 2 year old who stops at every rock tree, and needs to look at the candy that she gets, but they had a blast.
We were glad to get Brian that night and my burden became a little lighter.
He has been going quite a bit.
We are adjusting to the traveling, it gets a little easier but we still
really miss Brian when he is gone.

But he loves his job so we cannot complain.

Contentment? Me?

These are the pictures of contentment and peace.


Have you ever felt content?
It seems sudden to me...I do.

I can't say I don't worry about my housework, or money, or my family.
And yes I still think about those last 10 okay 20 pounds of baby fat...
that are slowly sliding off. I hope.

I am okay if my laundry goes unfolded.
I am happy if I can save money on groceries (thanks Shauntell!)
I am taking each moment of my children's lives as they come.
They Just grow to fast.
As for that pesky baby fat...I will get rid of it...but I still need to have a piece of chocolate.
I am okay with that.

For what seems like a long time.
I am not wishing to be some where else.
Be someone else.
Have someone else's money or success.

I woke up happy to just be.
SO what if my favorite jeans will have to wait.
SO what if I don't get to shower until noon.
I have all I need right now.

I only feel motivated to improve this renewed sense of life to ENJOY IT.
I want to make it better, strengthen it make it last.
I want to read with Madi longer, Play with Eleanor more.
And hold my little Owen forever.
Hugging and loving my husband always...

The moments are fleeting, and I have been trying too hard over time to push them on, saying, I can't wait until... instead of catching them, loving them and laughing at them.

Maybe this is the until for me...now! If so I am so glad!
I only have this life to get ready for the next why have I been so caught up getting to the until...

I suppose it would be easy to say I am content so, I am done.
NO this is not that kind of contentment.
I find this to be the "I have it good, I want this to be real."
I want to read, pray, and study...I don't want to coast anymore waiting for life to happen.
It is happening.
I am in it....I must love it.

Heavenly father has blessed me with this feeling of loving my life.
Loving who I am, who my children are and who my husband is.
I have changed in a way I cannot describe.
I want more joy.
I want to keep it.
I am content, but reaching for more of the stuff that brings real happiness.